How do you have a romantic time on Valentine's Day when you have a
crowd of kids who need to go places, you're packing to move, and your
daughter's in-laws are coming for dinner? You do something different,
that's how.
Today is Friday. Sunday is Valentine's
Day, but my daughter wanted her in-laws to come to see our house before
we moved out of it, so she asked if we could have a couples dinner on
the day. I love my daughter, so I said yes. I forgot I love my
husband, too. So, after we we started planning the couples day, I
thought about my dear husband.
"How about we go out on
Friday night and go to the Habitat Store to look for things for the new
house before dinner?" He very nicely said yes.
So,
today is Friday. Our house is so big, we have cleaning day because I'm
more of a project person than a maintenance person. This is it.
However, I stayed in bed and finished reading a Ted Dekker book my
college daughter took out of the library before she went back to
school. I told Steve to go away when he started creeping towards my
side of the bed. I finished the book, got up around 9:45, ate a bowl of
cereal while the kids watched Phineas and Ferb, and gave them their
marching orders. Then, I started cleaning my bathroom. Cleaning
bathrooms are the bane of my existence. They need so much cleaning!
And you're not usually in them for long unless you are in a hurry to get
somewhere else. But, since I spent last cleaning day packing, I had to
do the bathroom.
As I was cleaning the bathroom in
my nightgown, I realized that I didn't want to smell like this when I
went on my Valentine's date this evening, so I planned to clean my
personal corners after I did the bathroom. Which I did. However, we
are moving and, since I'm the mom, I am trying to use up all the dribs
and drabs of cleaning materials around the house. While cleaning my
corners, I realized that I had used some kids body wash and I was going
to smell like bubble gum for the rest of the day. How romantic. I got
out of the tub, was drying myself off and found, to my horror, that my
legs looked like a gorilla's. Back in the tub. Once going with the
razor, I found that it had been even longer since I'd done my underarms
and I thought I might have to take scissors to the hair in my armpits!
Does this sound familiar?
The
fact is, this is life for people who are responsible for others' needs
and wishes, maybe not for people who have only themselves to worry
about. We are moms. This is our life. And we wouldn't want it any
other way, would we? I'm down to six kids in school around our house
and I already feel like there are holes in the family structure. But,
the most important person in this whole deal is the one person I have
hardly mentioned in this article: my husband.
At our
wedding, the pastor exhorted us to keep our marriage first. That Steve
shouldn't let work or sports or hobbies come before me and I shouldn't
let kids or crafts or house or friends come before him. And that
includes sex. Yes. The "S" word. It is the only thing that
differentiates the marriage relationship from any other relationship.
It results in an intimacy and vulnerability and even sacrifice that no
other relationship on earth provides, not even twins. As evidenced in my
story today, life demands so many unromantic things of us; what do I do
to counteract that?
I will do what I planned: go on a
date with my husband and put on my red silk nightshirt and my black
lace panties for bed. And hope the kids go to bed early
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